Hey hey! It’s Cover Snark day!

How to Steal a Scoundrel's Heart by Vivienne Lorret. A seemingly normal historical romance clinch cover. Except a very moppety Pekingese is lurking in the corner on the purple train of the heroine's dress.

Elyse: Sunshine dog redux

Amanda: The dog startled me

Tara: I really want the dog to be a scoundrel too.

Sarah: Can I steal the dog? The humans I can take or leave.

Elyse: I can personally attest to the fact that brachycephalic dogs produce so much gas and those people are making out in a room full of dog farts

Sneezy: Hahahahaa I was just lolling at how RANDOM the dog is, and you just made the picture so much better Elyse.

Unless that’s actually a paper cut out of a dog, in which case holy shit why would they curse themselves like that.

Taking Vengeance by Kaylea Cross. A black and white cover with red accents for emphasis. A woman's hands are scratching at a man's torso. She also holds a red rose in her hands. Two daggers are crossed correct about the man's crotch.

From Sarah: “I have *so numerous questions*”

Sarah: I too am a Sarah, and I too have numerous, numerous questions.

Carrie: Far be it from me to kink shame! What happens between consenting adults is all good! Notwithstanding, PERSONALLY, castration isn’t my thing – and nonjudgement here but I don’t think those blades are sterile at ALL.

Susan: My brain interpreted the dot throughout the i as another knife and I’m just there like “Three? That seems excessive”

Amanda: My brain went to a “crossing swords” reference. And wow, really hope the thorns were cut off that stem.

Sneezy: The dimpling made by the correct hand makes me feel like the torso is actually made of some sort of plasty.

Alien Architect Needs a Nanny by Tasha Black. A shirtless cat man looks series as he holds an uncanny valley cat toddler total with red ears and striped red tail. The background is a moon and a futuristic city.

From Jen W and also Jen and also Jennifer (not even joking): Zomg. This cover has IT ALL: awful photoshop, models who clearly don’t want to be there, inexplicable glowing veins, and MORE. It’s a gift and I can’t stop giggling.

Sarah: I am every unmarried boggled, confused, and baffled gif ever made, all at once.

Carrie: Well, he clearly does need a nanny, I mean that baby is obviously in charge and you know that man gives the baby candy every time a tantrum looms.

Sarah: But with the pecs, and the ears, and the hair…he’s kind of like a cat tree for babies, though, right?

Sneezy: Drawing Nyan-kuns is an art. The placement of ears is EXTREMELY IMPORTANT!!!!!

That doesn’t say Nyan-kun to me. That says shitty headband. I am an avid Defender of Nyan-kuns, you impostor!!!!

AJ: I am making noises that are scaring the cat.

Which is ironic considering the dude on that cover looks like someone is doing the same object to him.

Amanda: Baby fingernails are sharp enough without them needing to be part cat.

Between His Lover and the Deep Blue Sea by Merry Farmer. A man with his button down shirt getting blown open stands on a beach. A ship is in the background. What's concerning is the disembodied hand reaching out for his pec.

Amanda: Definitely thought that was his own hand

Susan: I saw your remark before the picture and STILL thought it was his hand

Tara: My first thought was “Why is there a ship whether it’s approximately a merry farmer?”

Sarah: Everything approximately him proportionally is making me head tilt.

Amanda: He also reminds me – in the face – of the Castiel actor

Claudia: I feel we’ve done that one?

That arm of doom is familiar.

Susan: I think there was one like this but possibly with a mermaid

Amanda: Bitchery, have we done this one? Is everything blurring together into one big Cover Snark amalgamation?

Sneezy: At first I thought the L was a T, and now I think it’s not a letter but someone leaving secret codes approximately his junk.

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